Now, if you'll excuse me, Kelly will show you out."Kelly was already at the door as I rose to my feet and she led me overto the elevator."Your boss is quite a woman," I said."I know," she replied. "She's been a pretty good spouse the past fiveyears, too." You're married?" I said, surprised. "And for five years? I didn't thinktwo women could legally wed in New York State back then." They couldn't," she said, as the elevator doors were closing between us."But then I'm not a woman."Later, back in the Jersey motel room I shared with Carrie, I described thisencounter."It was amazing," I told her. "You would never have guessed she was a guy.And she's married to Kathryn Marrs, too. That was a shock." Oh, Chrissy," said Carrie. "Did it make you envious?" A little bit, yeah," I admitted, "but I think I'm going to love it there." Good," she said, coming over and slipping her arms around my waist. "Withluck we can get out of here soon and get somewhere better."I smiled up at my BFF and gave her. I figured I had been adopted or my parents stole me from the hospital. Totally wouldn't have surprised me. I was always the outcast. In my parents circles I was lucky not to get raped, I was sure it would happen. In the groups I wanted to be with I was lucky to get spoken too.My students had it great and they didn't even know it. You could really be who you wanted to be. Several of my kids where gay, or bi, or even asexual. No one ever tried to hide it. It was great but I was very jealous of them and they didn't understand how good they had it.As I walked out one of my hot teacher friends says "Goodbye, Tammy." No rape or no "you dirty whore" afterwords. God I hate my life. 'If I had the chance,' I thought 'it would all be different.'I am focused on what I am going to tell my husband. How I can't be Mrs. Duncan Trevall any more, or how I don't love him and totally don't want to have sex with him ever again. How I am going to tell him I know he is sleeping with a couple women from his.
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